Horses respond to your emotional and energetic way of being. They are capable of seeing patterns within you that you may not even be aware of in yourself. They can sense what is happening within you through your movement, breathing patterns, and posture. Your thoughts and feelings flow through you, creating physiological changes, that your horse will respond to.
All riders know this on some level – the more freaked out you become about something, the bigger of a reaction your horse will have. Horse and human can easily start to feed off one another – escalating the situation.
It is this same feedback loop that makes horses so wonderful in equine assisted therapy – they help clients to become aware of themselves by responding to subtle, energetic cues.
When you face behavioral issues with your horse, it is normal to turn to training methods and tools to correct those issues. Training horses is all about conditioning horses to respond to your cues. However, you have to remember that behavior stems from thoughts and emotions. When your horse is behaving poorly, it is because something is causing internal tension. That stress is then expressed in actions that you find undesirable.
With a traditional approach, greater stress is applied to the horse in order to mold (or correct) his behavior. The problem with actively addressing the issue through various aids is that you have not addressed the cause of the problem (internal stress). In addition, as you grow frustrated, frightened, or angry, even more stress is being added to the scenario. Your horse can read the change within you, but won’t necessarily understand why you are in a heightened emotional state.
Instead of responding to your horse with training techniques, you can instead focus on your state of mind. Peace within you will lead to peace within your horse. To be a strong leader is not about showing your horse who’s boss. It’s about demonstrating how you want him to be – calm, curious, and connected.
The next time your horse does something undesirable, try a different approach. First, make sure that you are safe and establish a boundary if necessary. Behavior that is dangerous needs to be addressed more proactively. If your horse is showing behavioral problems that are not a direct threat to your wellbeing, then you can proceed. Safety always comes first!
Let’s say your horse is balking at a hose on the ground. Rather than moving his feet to establish dominance, become still. Rather than pressure and release, go for connection and trust. Rather than pushing or pulling, lead by example.
Your state of mind will directly affect how your horse handles any situation. The more that you become calm, centered, and grounded, the less reaction your horse will have. Consistency is key. Over time, you can build trust with your horse so that he will turn to you when feeling internal distress. As you learn to respond with inner peace, your horse will begin to heal past trauma and will be triggered less often by life.
Note that this is also a key point in preparing horses to facilitate therapeutic sessions. We want our horses to respond to clients – not react based on past experiences, stresses, and triggers.
How do you shift your state of mind to affect your horse’s behavior?
A good starting point is to practice connecting with your horse when there is no problem. With your horse at liberty or haltered, spend some time practicing a quiet, meditative state. Notice how you can connect with your horse and help him to relax by deliberately being still with him.
- Begin by stilling your body. We are typically so busy with our horses – always moving, touching them, doing something. Instead, stand near him and keep your attention on him without all of the busyness – much like a herd mate would do. Share space and do nothing. Be still.
- Keep your horse in your line of sight, but soften your gaze. You don’t have to look directly at your horse to have him in your field of vision. Be aware of your surroundings without concentrating or focusing on any one thing deliberately.
- Focus on your breath. Slow your breathing down to a nice rhythmic rate. You can count to six as you breathe in and six as you breathe out to find a nice slow rhythm.
These three simple steps are a great beginning. As you find a calm inner state, be sure that you are connecting with your horse and sharing in the experience. As you practice this state of being, you will be better prepared for behavioral upsets as they arise.
Now when your horse spooks at the hose on the ground and refuses to move forward, slip into the above state of stillness. Ask your horse not to crowd you, but also not pull at the end of the lead rope. As you become still, your horse will turn to you for that comfort – no one enjoys feeling stressed. When you demonstrate that all is well, he will follow your lead.
Once you have stopped the fight or flight response and moved into a connected state, your horse can once again respond to his surroundings with less drama. Now you can calmly ask that he walk with you over the hose. When you see the stress response escalate, stop again and find your calm centered place. All of this is building trust and healing past experiences for your horse.
Furthermore, you are not adding to your horses list of bad experiences. You are showing him a different way to react to life. Our domestic horses are much more sensitive than their wild counterparts due to the way that we keep and train them. The more that you can do to stay calm and connected, the healthier your horse will be and the less behavioral challenges that you will encounter.